Lyris and Postgres

I have been trying to get Lyris listmanager to work on one server while
connecting to a postgres database on a remote server.

All I get is errors like this:

Attempting to connect to server: xxx.xxx.xxx.xxx
SQLClass::SessionSession() error on PQsetdbLogin

Unable to connect to SQL database with settings provided in configuration
file.
Server failed to initialize, and is unable to run.

In the config file for Lyris it appears everything is correct and I can
connect directly to the database on the remote machine. But for some reason
I can't get Lyris to connect remotely to the database.

Would there be some kind of permission setting I have not seen?

How can I check the actual port the remote database is running on?

Thanks,
Mickey